Epiphany
by Mardia
Summary: At a critical moment in his career, Ric has to wrestle with his inner demons and make a choice.


_Title: Epiphany_

_Rating: PG-13_

_Genre: Drama/Angst_

_Pairings: Ric/Alexis with brief mentions of Ric/Elizabeth._

_Summary: At a critical moment in his career, Ric has to wrestle with his inner demons and make a choice. Warning: spoilers._

_Disclaimer: Hah! If I owned GH, things would be so much different. Except for Ric/Alexis. Because they rule._

_A/N: Okay, people, this does have mention of child molestation, not to mention, it's pretty dark. Not much laughter here. And there are spoilers._

* * *

"Lansing...this is a sweet deal."

I met Ethan Blake's eyes. Smug, arrogant bastard. The man was slime, and his client was slime...

...and I was actually considering this proposal, which probably made me slime too.

"You're asking me to let your client walk on three counts of assault and rape," I said, my voice flat.

Blake smiled in a way he no doubt thought was charming. "We're not asking for that much...just for a little leniency."

Sarah Henry, the ADA who had assisted me on the case, piped up at this moment. "_Leniency_? Your client brutally attacked and raped three women, including his own wife."

"Yeah, and he also worked for Sonny Corinthos and is willing to tell you everything he knows," Blake snapped. "Come on, Lansing...everyone knows you want to take down your big brother more than anything." He opened his arms out wide. "Well, here's your chance."

Sarah turned to me. "You can't do this," she said urgently.

Couldn't I? God, she was young. All of a sudden, she seemed so young and...green. Had I ever been that naive? Of course I could do it. Deals were made all the time.

Of course, I'd have a hell of a time explaining that to the victims. But it was _Sonny_. Sonny, whom I loathed with a passion that scared even me sometimes. Sonny, who had subverted the system so many times, who deserved to rot in jail. Sonny, with his arrogance, his total disrespect for the law. Sonny, who was a threat to all of his children...including Kristina.

But there was Melinda. A part-time college student slumming at Jake's on the wrong night. Ended up in the E.R with a broken cheekbone, not to mention the fact that she'd been raped.

And Cathy. A bartender at Jake's with two kids. He'd followed her home, forced her to do what he wanted for the sake of her children's lives. And then he'd fractured her jaw anyway.

And Andrea. She'd had the poor judgment to marry this slimeball...and God, how she had paid for it. Constant physical and emotional abuse...been handed around to this scumbag's friends like a party favor. After three years of married hell, she was as familiar with the inner workings of the E.R as any nurse or doctor who worked there.

Their faces, their stories, their pain, had been burned into my brain. For weeks, this case had been my priority. Taking down this bastard had been my priority. I'd stayed up all night working on it. Practiced what I was going to say in front of the jury out loud until my voice turned hoarse.

And I had asked those women to get up on that stand. Asked them to bare their pain for the world to see. Asked them to face the man who had brutalized them. Asked them to face slime like Blake and let him try to shred their credibility. I had asked them to do all this...and in return; I had promised them that I was going to take this monster down.

And I had done it. I had jumped up every five seconds during the defense's case, screaming 'objection' whether it was warranted or not. I'd kept Steven Webber working overtime, making sure the forensics was on our side. I'd spent hours prepping witnesses. I delivered a closing statement that blew the defense out of the water.

The defendant, Bill Tupulsky, was going down. I knew it, and Blake knew it. Which is why he was here now, while the jury was deliberating, asking me to go easy on his client.

And in return for letting Tupulsky off, I could take Sonny down.

Tupulsky had worked for Sonny and Jason for over four years. He didn't know everything, maybe, but he probably knew a lot. Enough for me to start a case at least.

"Ric?" Sarah asked, clearly worried.

"Lansing, I'd like an answer soon," Blake prompted.

I got up out of my chair and started to pace. "All of you shut up. I'm thinking."

And I remembered. I remembered my stepmother, and the vodka I could always smell on her breath the nights when she'd crawl into my bed when I was young. How she would always hiss in my ear, "Darling, this stays just between us, all right?" as her icy-cold hands wandered under the sheets.

Elizabeth, on our wedding day. Both our wedding days. And meeting up with her and Cameron, the little boy who could have been my son, in the park.

Alexis and Kristina. Kristina eating my french fries, me kissing Alexis in my office. Lying on top of Alexis on my desk. Hearing Alexis tell me in an anguished voice a truth I'd already known, that Kristina was my niece. Knowing what Sonny would do to Alexis if he found out. What could happen to Kristina if he found out.

And of course, Sonny. Sonny in the police station, having the unmitigated gall to say out loud that he was a law-abiding citizen. Me, being shocked that God hadn't struck him dead right there. Sonny, walking over everyone, ripping apart lives without a second thought, just because it suited him.

But I also remembered meeting Melinda in the E.R. I remembered handing her a tissue to wipe away her tears. Meeting Cathy's kids. Seeing Andrea walk into my office and tell me about the three years of hell she'd endured. Comforting these women, assuring them that it was all going to work out.

I remembered the relief in Alexis's face when I'd actually walked away once from a confrontation with Sonny. I remembered playing with Kristina the day after the wedding. Getting the adoption papers in the mail.

I continued to pace.

_For what is a man profited..._

What did I have to gain from this? What did I have to lose?

Seeing Sonny in jail.

The look on Alexis's face when she found out what I'd done.

Explaining to the victims, to their families, why Tupulsky was getting a break.

Seeing Sonny be put in handcuffs, and knowing that I'd won. Keeping Kristina safe from him, once and for all. If Sonny was sentenced to jail, no matter how long, that instantly meant he could never have joint custody. And my niece, my stepdaughter, would be safe.

_...if he shall gain the whole world..._

Alexis had confided in me once. She had told me that the key to being a good lawyer wasn't about winning cases, or how big the paycheck got. It was simply about doing your job in a way that allowed you to be able to look at yourself in the mirror.

"Every day," Alexis had whispered, "I check. I come home, and I look in the mirror. If I can still look at myself, then I know I've done a good day's work."

Would I be able to look in the mirror, knowing that I'd actually helped this scum?

Would I be able to look in the mirror, knowing I'd let Sonny walk away from his crimes again?

_...and lose his own soul?_

I closed my eyes. God, now I knew what it felt like to be Alexis when she was hyperventilating. I could barely catch my breath, as images floated in my mind. Kristina, smiling up at me. Alexis. My nephew Michael and his terrifying stare. Elizabeth with Cameron in her arms. Carly...oh, God, Carly in the panic room. Sonny. My father, who'd never given a damn. My stepmother and her cold hands.

Cathy. Melinda. Andrea. The medical reports. Bruising on the wrists. Broken cheekbones and jaws. Emotional trauma that would last them a lifetime. A pained father asking me to take the bastard who'd hurt his daughter down.

Yachts exploding in the water. Gunfire. Bombs. Bought confessions.

Sonny's merciless eyes.

_For what is a man profited, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul?_

When I opened my eyes, it took me a moment to realize where I was. The interrogation room at the police station.

And I knew, deep down in my bones, what I was going to say.

"No deal," I told them, my voice strong and steady. I was proud of that. There was no hesitation, because I knew this was the right thing to do. There would be another chance to take Sonny down. But I could never nail Tupulsky again, and dammit, this bastard deserved to go down. Now. Today. "Get the hell out."

Blake's beady eyes were huge. So were his client's. And so was Sarah's. Clearly, they hadn't been expecting that. "Lansing," Tupulsky said for the first time in a hoarse voice, "I'm handing you Sonny Corinthos on a silver platter."

"And I'm not taking the bait," I said in a harsh voice. "Now get the hell out of my sight."

Blake sputtered, "This isn't over. The jury--"

"The jury is going to find your client guilty," I snapped. "I saw the way they were looking at your client, Blake, and so do you. They know he's guilty." I smiled at Tupulsky, who looked shell-shocked. "I suggest you enjoy your last few moments of freedom while they last, Mr. Tupulsky, because you are going away for a very, very long time. Get out."

They left, and Sarah was staring at me with shining eyes. "I was worried there for a minute," she confided.

I let my shoulders slump, feeling utterly drained. Apparently an epiphany will do that to you. "Honestly, so was I."

"You did the right thing, you know," Sarah told me. "You regret it?"

"No," I told her. "I might start having second thoughts the next time I see my despised half-brother...but it was the right decision. Now, let's get back to the courthouse so we can see the jury nail this bastard."

* * *

_"Has the jury reached a verdict?"_

_"We have, your Honor."_

_"What say you?"_

_"We, the jury, find the defendant, William Tupulsky, guilty on all counts."_

* * *

Alexis appeared at my office, smiling at me. "Congratulations on the Tupulsky case." 

"Why, thank you," I replied smoothly, relaxing in my chair. To make a good day even better, the judge in charge of sentencing Tupulsky was not known for his leniency regarding rapists. Tupulsky was going away for a long, long time.

She stepped into my office. "You know, there's a rumor going around that Tupulsky and his weasel lawyer were sniffing around here for a deal right before the jury came back with their verdict."

"Is that so?"

"Yes, it is," she responded. "They say that Tupulsky was offering up information on Sonny...and that you didn't take it." She tilted her head. "Would you like to comment on that?"

"You know I can't discuss that case with you," I told her.

"Are you denying it?" I said nothing, and her smile grew wider. "I'm proud of you. You did the right thing."

"I know," I said, smiling back at her. "Let's go home."

And we did.

_Matthew 16:26. For what is a man profited, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul?_


End file.
